


Cloud nine

by oreob1tch (orphan_account)



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Crack, M/M, pure crack istg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-07
Updated: 2019-07-07
Packaged: 2020-06-23 22:05:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19710364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/oreob1tch
Summary: "It was a joke, Jesus," the shorter creature sat on the cloud near the gate when the angel grabbed his weapon of choice and threw it all the way to the hell's gate.Seonghwa frowns. "I'm not Jesus, that guy's on a vacation. I'm Seonghwa."





	Cloud nine

**Author's Note:**

> If you're religious and you decide to read this, please know that i was not trying to make fun of any religion and this is just for fun. Please don't hate me, it's just fiction.

Living in heaven should be, as the name suggests, heaven, right? Seonghwa lived his whole life as a good christian, hoping to get into heaven after his death.  
So when he did get there, after the awful, terrible car crash, he was happy. As happy as someone who just died could be, only to find out that heaven is nothing like people imagine it.

Well, at least in most ways. There's a huge gold gate and angels standing there, talking to the deceased. There are clouds all around him and he can even walk on them. He notices that once a person enters heaven, their face becomes way more beautiful, as if Seonghwa hit them with a Photoshop tool and pushed him into a pile of facetune options.

But God, he was the biggest difference from what was expected. Seonghwa expected an old man, with beard and grey hair. Instead, he was welcomed by a bald man who didn't look older than Seonghwa himself. He seemed a little off, as if he was high but it was _God_ so Seonghwa couldn't really asked him.

Another very surprising thing was God's relationship with Satan. They didn't hate each other, actually they met up on the regular and they had some sort of prank wars going on. Seonghwa wishes he didn't know these things.

****  
Seonghwa grips the key in his hand and walks up to the gate to see few souls pointing at him and giggling. He glares at them. _Guess who's not getting in today._

He unlocks the heavy door that creaks as he pushes it open. Just as he's about to kick the log against the door to keep it from closing, he notices the black letters sprayed on the gold gate. He slips behind the door and crouches down to see it. **_GOD STINKS_** is all it says, in big, black, ugly letters. God floats over to him, completely ignoring the gasps from the souls. He sees the graffiti and chuckles. "Lucifer is definitely getting better."

"You call this good?" Seonghwa frowns, waving at few young angels and telling them to scrub the heaven's gate clean. He wishes this was the first time they had to deal with this.

"No, I said it was better. Last time he sent Yeosang up here with a sneezing powder. Poor boy breathed it in and kept sneezing all the way down to hell."

Yeosang is Satan's favorite demon, and someone Seonghwa sees way more often than the souls living in heaven with him. He doesn't look like a demon, his face beautiful and weirdly smooth just like the angels. He's tiny and the only thing giving him away are those cute little horns he has. Seonghwa and Yeosang aren't really friends, mainly because Satan likes to send Yeosang up to the heaven's gate to vandalize stuff and make Seonghwa's afterlife even harder than it already is.

But he doesn't hate him either, even though the first time he's caught him spraying graffitti on the gate, he was close to strangling him.

It was early in the morning and the angel was getting ready to open the gate and let in the souls that just left their bodies.

The demon before him put his hand behind his back though the large spray container was still pretty much visible.

"So that was you!" Seonghwa tried to snatch it out of the demon's hands. "I'm not gonna let you damage our gate again!"

"It was a joke, Jesus," the shorter creature sat on the cloud near the gate when the angel grabbed his weapon of choice and threw it all the way to the hell's gate.  
Seonghwa frowns. "I'm not Jesus, that guy's on a vacation. I'm Seonghwa." The demon looked at him and scratched his horns - something he does quite often, the angel noticed few days later. "I'm Yeosang." Seonghwa nodded at him and sat down on the cloud next to him.

"Satan sent you?"

"God broke into his weed stash last week," Yeosang replied simply. Seonghwa, being in heaven for only few months at that time choked on air that didn't exist in heaven, with lungs that didn't work.

"He did what now?"

****

But that happened ages ago and he's beeing seeing the demon on the regular now. Sometimes, God finds them chatting as the angel makes the demon scrub whatever he finds written on the gate or anything that belongs in heaven. He always smiles at the small creature and pats Seonghwa on the back before disappearing and Seonghwa can only guess where he's going.

Both Yeosang and then angel can agree on the fact that this prank war that those two are having is stupid and childish but it's probably better than what he actually expected.

Sometimes, Yeosang asks him questions about his life, what it was like, what he was like, and Seonghwa beams every time because none of the angels gives a fuck and he likes talking about his past because he had a good life.

And then one day, Yeosang brings him brownies. Seonghwa frowns and squints at the tray.

"What is this?"

"Brownies?" Yeosang looks nervous. "It's for you, not for God. So there's no reason for you to be worried, I promise." Seonghwa takes the tray from Yeosang's hands and places it on the desk by the gate. They've always talked just by the heaven's gate or the hell's one, never daring to take the other one in. Seonghwa wonders what would God say if he took the demon home.

"Why," he clears his throat after he breathes in a small cloud floating around them. Tastes like dirty dishwater. "Why did you bring me brownies?"

"Oh," Yeosang's cheeks turn red, almost the same shade as his horns. "Well Satan says that I make killer brownies and that I should make them for someone I want to be my friend. But demons around me don't like chocolate..." he pauses, tugging on the sleeves of his ripped sweater. "I think that's why they ended up in hell. Who the hell doesn't like chocolate?" Seonghwa snorts out a laugh and looks at Yeosang fondly, finally stops feeling suspicious about the delicious looking brownies that are sitting on lap.

"You want me to be your friend?" Yeosang nods and says nothing else. The angel's heart flutters a little and he feels stupid because as a former human he knows damn well what it means. He takes a piece and bites into it, enjoying the flavors he hasn't had the chance to enjoy in so long. "How did you manage to bake something like this in hell?"

Yeosang giggles. "There are these big ovens in our back room, we always show them to the new souls we get from up here and scare them with them, that there's where we're going to shove them. The only thing that's ever shoved there is this though," he points at the tray of brownies. "..oh and one time, San, Satan's favorite demon, shoved his dick in. Don't ask, none of us knows why."

Seonghwa chokes on the piece that he was chewing and Yeosang freaks out and starts patting his back. "Are you okay?"

"He didn't shove that in while this was baking, right?"

"And what did you think the frosting was?" the demon starts laughing at Seonghwa's mortified expression. "Don't worry, I'm just joking."

****

Apparently, God thinks that it's a great idea to invite Yeosang into heaven, to scare the new angels if nothing else. Seonghwa rolls his eyes as God goes on, telling him that he can already picture their terrified faces when Seonghwa tells them that Yeosang is there to pick them up and to take them to hell where they belong. The angel wonders if this is happening in hell as well.

"You got really close to Yeosang, didn't you?" God suddenly asks. The sun is setting so the heaven is slowly getting darker and darker.

"We're friends." He's well aware of where this is going. He noticed that the pranks are not even that bad lately and then Satan keeps sending Yeosang up here for no apparent reason. He waits for God to make him do the same thing.

"Don't ever think that I don't know about your plan. You and Satan are trying to set us up!"

God rolls his eyes at Seonghwa. "I don't see the big deal. You're beautiful but he's dense. _Demons_ can be like that."  
Seonghwa closes the heavy book and gets ready to lock the gate.

"We're angels, God," Seonghwa reminds him. "We're all beautiful."

God crouches his down and points at an angel that is trying to get all the clouds back into their respectful spots. "See that angel over there? He's definitely not that beautiful." Seonghwa punches God's arm weakly.

"That's mean! He's a good guy!"

"Yeah but he's not as cute as you and even Satan noticed that Yeosang keeps talking about you more and more. Just like you talk about him."

Seonghwa doesn't understand why would such creatures as the devil himself and god want a demon and an angel to ...what? date? Is that even a thing in heaven?

"You should bring him some brownies too," God suggests and giggles when Seonghwa argues that they have no oven. Then he snaps his fingers and hands him a tray of minicakes. "Go ahead. Now it's hell's primetime and Yeosang will be happy to see you!"

Seonghwa takes the tray and with a sigh he starts walking down the long stairway all the way down to hell.

He knocks on the door and almost drops the cakes when a demon opens and starts screaming as soon as her eyes land on the angel. Yeosang runs up to her and his eyes soften when he sees Seonghwa but frowns immediately, pushing the other demon back in.

"You ruined our party!" Yeosang mumbles as he closes the heavy metal door behind himself, the loud music trapped behind it. "She's gonna tell the others and they will freak out, too."

"Your what? What are you celebrating?" Seonghwa asks, fidgeting with the the tray of mini cakes.

"Nothing, we have parties three times a week, Satan's wish. What did you think we were doing everyday? Torture the souls?" Seonghwa nods. "Well they do have to clean up after Satan everytime, the dude doesn't understand that Chipotle doesn't sit well in his stomach."

"I brought you something," the angel pushes the tray into Yeosang's chest who almost drops it. The demon smiles widely, his red eyes shining bright in the dark. "Want to...want to come in?"

Seonghwa nods.

****

Yeosang gives him a brief tour of hell and then takes him to something that Seonghwa assumes is his room. It's surprisingly clean but still somehow smells of sulfur. Seonghwa is shocked that the shorter demon beside him doesn't smell of that.

He notices something on the bedside table and crouches down to see. "What is this?" he looks closely at the creature. Yeosang plops down next to him, tapping on the glass.

"That's Satan's pet."

Seonghwa squints, trying to read the name on the little mailbox that is in the fishbowl. Satan really couldn't get any more extra. "Who _made_ this?"

"Your dad," Yeosang replies, scratching his horns nervously when Seonghwa looks at him confused. "God? Isn't he your dad?"

"I'm adopted." There's an awkward pause. "What's its name?"

"Oh! Dongfish. See that thing connected to him? That's horngus and it's attached by a scungle to a kind of dillsack."

Seonghwa lets out a pained squeak. "This really is hell."

"God made this during one of the parties we host," the demon explains. "Drunk out of his mind. We all love Dongfish though." The angel is not even surprised that God attends hell's parties. He'd be shocked if God actually didn't. Seems like him and Satan are actually besties. Humans are so wrong, so so wrong about all of this.

"I think God and Satan are trying to set us up," he tells Yeosang after the demon lets him _pet_ Dongfish.

"I know. He knows I like you."

"Oh?" he feels himself turn red. _How? He's dead._

"Yeah..." it gets awkward for a moment. "I like you. It's okay if you don't like me, though." before Seonghwa can really say anything, there's a loud beeping noise and everything spins. His head hurts and the halo above his hand falls down and shatters.

"Seonghwa?"

"What's going on?" the angel covers his ears as the beeping intesifies and shuts his eyes tight.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When he opens them again, he's not in hell. He's not even in heaven. He looks around, frantic, confused. Where's Yeosang?

He recognizes this place. Or at least knows what kind of place this is. The door opens and the person that comes in drops everything in their hands. "Oh my god you're awake. Doctor? Doctor!"

Seonghwa is still confused and wonders if he fell asleep in Yeosang's bed and this is his dream. A very familiar figure rushes in. "I see you woke up. Take it easy mister Park, you've been in coma for few weeks so you might be a little disoriented."

Coma? Wait...did he actually survive the car crash?

He looks up at the doctor. "Yeosang?"

The doctor winks.

**Author's Note:**

> let's chat on [twitter](https://mobile.twitter.com/_candystyx_) !


End file.
